Archive for January, 2008

Life…

What is life?

Well i guess most people take life as a hope, a hope for a better tomorrow so this is what motivates them for a better tomorrow, a better future?So what do you do when your desired future is vanished?

My desired future, that was to build up a family with you, what i promised you, what we talked about so much about what we gonna do together. Remember the mail i sent to you talking bout it before we broke up?Actually i sent it after i knew bout your affair to see how much more do you have me in your heart, but judging what you replied, i knew we will be nothing more than friends in the future.

You said you’ve changed, i agree and accept it because i know what you are facing is very different from the past. I know i won’t be able to understand because i’m not the one facing it but who’s the one who choose this?I’m not blaming you but i’ve being trying my very best for you here, waking up in the middle of the night just to hear you voice, staying at home and skip dinner with my family just to chat with you,doing things on behalf of you. Maybe you don’t know but i always put you as my priority, even above my family. Even when i knew bout your affair i wasn’t thinking about why you doing this, i’m worried, worry of what kind of guy you are facing and etc. That’s how much i used to love you.

I always wonder why am i punished for being loyal, for loving you?A friend of mine was even asking me how confident i am with you with all the exposure you have(just months after you went there), i, being childish and etc told him i have all my trust on you and what happen then?You have no idea how many people got the suprise look when i told them bout us, bout what happen. I really don’t get it, why are you hiding it from me?Maybe you’ll think that i won’t be able to take it, maybe you feel i’m too weak to know the truth until i have to find it out myself?

Someone told me “You guys don’t look like a close couple” shortly after we broke up, it makes me wonder, how long has it being since you lost your feeling on me?1 month?1year?2years?Why didn’t you tell me anything at all?What happen to the promise of sharing everything?When i confront you, you told me “I don’t know how long it was gonna last” and you just went disappear for 1 week. I didn’t know i’m such a good spare bf that you can keep and use whenever you need, and 1 week later you told me you have friends over that time thus can’t answer my call and etc. That just explain how unimportant i am for you, isn’t it?

Whose the one who told me it’s hard to explain things on phone, whose the one who wanna meet me and clear things up?What happen then?I’m tired of waiting for you, tired of missing you, tired of loving you. It’s all gone now, the one i love, things that i care the most, things that matters to me the most, it’s now all nothing but memories.

I don’t love you anymore, you’ve changed and the one i love has gone so let my love for you be memories.

我愛的人

Being really busy lately, my final is coming and my 1st paper in on thursday. Spent last 2 days rushing on some assignment because my idiot lecturer who only release the result on last day of school and as expected, i fail with 7 marks short thus have to resubmit. Went back to resubmit today and realized from others that i actually did alot of extra work, bloody hell told us individual assignment and in the end he tell others he allow 2 person a group and cut down alot of work for them. I’m left speechless and hope he bloody pass me, else he’s gonna get a complaint letter from me!>.<

Being watching this Taiwan show last 2 weeks name 超級星光大道, ya i know i’m abit outdated but don’t blame me, blame Astro =p Heard this song sing by 陳小春

陳小春 – 我愛的人

我知道故事不會太曲折
我總會遇見一個什麼人
陪我過沒有了她的人生
成家立業之類的 等等

她做了她覺得對的選擇
我只好祝福她真的對了
愛不到我最想要愛的人
誰還能要我怎樣呢

我愛的人 不是我的愛人
她心裡每一寸 都屬於另一個人
她真幸福 幸福得真殘忍
讓我又愛又恨 她的愛怎麼那麼深

我愛的人 她已有了愛人
從他們的眼神 說明了我不可能
每當聽見 她或他說「我們」
就像聽見愛情 永恆的嘲笑聲

Sounds like a song for me?Thing is i accidentally saw a pic of us when i was looking for a file in my computer, i have this weird feeling which tells me i still miss her…

Happy New Year

Happy new year to all of you out there!

Update on my new rig, it’s finally working now. Went to collect it on Sunday with my family as we went to Pavilion earlier and drop by at Lowyat around 7pm. Well i’m still using the same spec as they claimed they change another new processor for me and it works fine. My dad thought get a little impatient and request them to offer 1 month 1-to-1 warranty as i have being going back for so many times over the same problem, and they have to give in. New nickname for my dad – KOC(King of Complaint) Anyone wanna have a try on my dad’s complaint skill, make your reservation here :D

Back on new year, seems like 2007 is quite a happening year for me in both good and bad ways. Major ones is really out of my expectation which is breaking up with her. Well enough of being sad for that, just have to move on cos it’s all history now. Moreover i don’t think she can be bother with me now, she’s a good lover but surely never a good friend.

Others things are like i change my computer finally after 5 yrs, brought myself an ipod touch, change phone brand to Nokia after using SE for so long >.< My dad sold my Altis and now i’m driving Myvi again and i did quite well in my exam back in September, for the 1st time i feel so proud of my result in college!hahaha!!Speaking of exam i’ll be having exam soon too, 2 weeks to go!Gotta work hard to maintain my Merit :D

As for 2008, i have set a few targets to achieve

1. Diet!!(70kg?I’m 80 now!!!) No fast food anymore pls >.<

2. Do well in exam and intership

That’s all for now, i’m not greedy am i? :D